Bringing Beautiful Back

I helped a bride last night who got me thinking. She tried on a few dresses that I would never have picked out for myself. However, helping her was a very unexpected breathe of fresh air. In the three short months that I have been a bridal consultant I have become very accustomed to hearing the words, "I want to look sexy" in response to my question about what kind of styles they had in mind for their big day. It is no surprise that a bride wants to feel and look her absolute best on what is Lord willing her only wedding day, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that desire. However, should our desire be to look sexy or beautiful? Should we save the sexy for the wedding night and focus on the beauty of the bride and the covenant that they are entering into that day? I say yes.

Alright, back to my bride. She never once mentioned the word "sexy" nor did she say anything about wanting her chest to be pushed up to Canada (neither did her mother for that matter!). She simply said that she wanted to feel beautiful and timeless. She tried on a couple dresses that on the hanger I would have rolled my eyes at and said "oh Lord no". However, on her they were beautiful. She wanted to be covered up and she wanted to look like royalty. So, I brought her the dress that is quite literally the Kate Middleton wannabe dress. This dress is almost exactly like Kate's except for the fact that it has long lace sleeves instead of 3/4 sleeves like Kate's. She agreed to try it on and when she came out of the dressing room and I put a Vera Wang Cathedral veil with a lace edging on her, the group went silent. The simple response was "That's it." I could not believe how classic and elegant she looked. Probably the farthest thing from our modern definition of "sexy", but it was perfect that way. She looked like Grace Kelly.

There was one thing that her mom said when they were comparing which dress they liked better that really hit me. She said, "This dress allows her beauty to shine through, it doesn't distract from it." This wasn't just about how she looked. It was about who she was and how her wedding and her dress reflected that. I breathed a sigh of relief.

Are we afraid of beauty? Do we even know what true beauty is? I would say that at best we are very fuzzy on the definition. We have "sexy" thrown in our faces everywhere we go and I think we've mistaken it for beauty. "Beautiful" isn't the goal anymore, and that makes me sad.

Ladies, let's do our best to bring beautiful back to the wedding day and save sexy for the wedding night. Men, your job is to encourage it. Can we do that? I think we can.

*disclaimer* this is not a campaign for only wearing long sleeve dresses on your wedding day or any other day. It's just about being classy and appreciating true beauty over showing off everything you've got.